It’s National Prosecco Day, where you at?
Young Van Helsing here, who you be? So a lot of shit has gone down on the internets this week…grab that bottle of prosecco (kombucha for Sharon) and get ready – it's lit.
FIRST OF ALL…RUDE. I love Hawaii but damn, what about when I’m in a rush to meet my latest internet boyfran or boyfran(s)? Or I have to stop and tweet about how he not my boyfran? Or like just share my love for Riri in a group txt…
SECOND OF ALL. F*$%! It’s here. Don’t even try to get yo shit together…
The social medias:
So Decpacito is still trying to become a thing. Gawd Karen, just stahp. Have you ever seen sarcasm on Twitter? Never. The Gram is really trying to get you, through bots, through yo frands. Should you delete it though. HA, as if. But really…be careful what you post, be authentic, mmkay? Don’t go using the wrong hashtags…And as much as you really wanna yell at Carol for that GHASTLY photo she put up from your #thirstythursday mishaps, don’t be this guy. Check your analytics like the rest of us and move on.
What’s for dinner? Pizza party anyone? This is great! Or maybe a drive by pop rocks taco date? Save room for Chester…Ready to get your drank on? The Queen will keep you on your toes. But don’t bring her any of this shit, this sad excuse for a beer, or any of that probiotic business. She’s cool with these guys. Never fear, you can get your "coffee fix" AND stay sober if none of that is for you.
Ok ok, some biznatch: Read this before our meeting tomorrow. Work smart, care less. And travel dammit! But make time for humor (even if the ad world isn’t doing so hot). Tired of being ignored, Are you emailing wrong? Maybe you should try this too. But if a phone call is more your style…do it right.
And my favorite…the weird, the wonderful, the random shit I found this week:
Ok, now go about your life again…and don’t underestimate anybody today.